


Dear God

by clizziem



Series: Don't Smile at Me [11]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Child Abuse, Gen, Hurt Zuko (Avatar), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Iroh (Avatar) is a Good Uncle, M/M, Ozai (Avatar) Being a Terrible Parent, Sokka is a good boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:27:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28598439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clizziem/pseuds/clizziem
Summary: Sokka wakes up to his phone ringing incessantly. He glances at his alarm clock and frowns. It’s only nine in the morning on a Saturday.And Azula is calling him.Sokka on Zuko telling the Gaang on he got his scar
Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), The Gaang & Zuko (Avatar)
Series: Don't Smile at Me [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2079291
Comments: 12
Kudos: 335





	Dear God

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, shout out to planetesimalwords for this suggestion, I have no idea how I didn't think of doing this  
> Second. I got a little carried away again. Sorry to pour two servings of angst in a row but some of y'all seem to like that so.  
> Third of all, TW for descriptions of child abuse. I don't think it's that graphic, but I upped the rating to be safe.  
> Fourth of all. I have no idea how business works, I'm an English major, so all the business stuff is probably wrong  
> Enjoy!

Sokka wakes up to his phone ringing incessantly. He glances at his alarm clock and frowns. It’s only nine in the morning on a Saturday.

And Azula is calling him.

They’ve made peace with Azula but she never really calls or texts anyone other than Katara. He sits up and rubs the sleep out of his eyes and picks up his phone.

“Hello?”

“You guys have to come over,” she says in lieu of a greeting.

“Good morning to you, too, Azula,” Sokka says.

“I’m serious. Zuko’s...not doing well. Get your asses over here.” She hangs up and Sokka’s left staring at his comforter. He drops his phone and pulls on a sweatshirt. He sends Zuko a quick text telling him they are coming.

“Sokka?” Katara says from the other side of his door. “Did you get Azula’s message?”

“Yeah, she called me. Can you tell Toph, Aang, and Suki we’re coming to pick them up?” He asks.

“Azula told them already. They’re waiting for us,” Katara says. Sokka sighs and pulls on some pants and socks.

It must be bad.

Azula doesn’t communicate with all of them if she can help it. He tugs his sneakers on and heads downstairs.

“Can someone text Azula that we’re here?” Sokka asks and puts the car in park.

“I got it,” Suki says and starts typing. Sokka clenches the steering wheel and bites his lip. Katara puts her hand on his arm and he turns to face her.

“You okay?” She whispers. Sokka shakes his head.

“It must be bad if he didn’t tell me,” Sokka whispers back. “We just became official, he knows he can tell me anything.”

“Azula says we can come in,” Suki says. They pile out of the car and Sokka stares at the ground. He feels sick.

Zuko’s told him bits and pieces of some of the horrible things his father did to him. Even Azula has filled in some of the details of their childhood. But Sokka always felt like Zuko was withholding the more grim details.

Azula opens the front door and steps outside. Sokka expects her to look angry, but her eyes are red-rimmed and she’s not wearing any makeup.

“What’s wrong?” Aang asks after a second of silence. Azula rubs her eye and Sokka notices how her normally well-styled hair is in a messy bun and she’s still wearing pajamas.

“It’s...It’s the anniversary of something. For Zuko,” she says. Her voice is tight and her eyes shine with unshed tears. “Iroh and I have been trying to help but he’s been having flashbacks and nightmares all week and we’re trying to help but we just keep making it worse and I don’t know what to do so I thought-” she breaks off and buries her head in her hands. Katara steps forward and wraps her arms around Azula’s shoulders. Normally Azula just stands limply in Katara’s hugs but this time she clings to her like she’s the last solid thing on earth.

“It’s the scar, isn’t it?” Katara asks. Azula nods and buries her face in Katara’s shoulder. Sokka tugs on his fingers and his heart starts pounding again. He doesn’t want to think about what Zuko looks like if this is what Azula looks like.

There’s a rumble behind him and suddenly there’s another car on the street. Sokka doesn’t recognize the driver, but Ty Lee is in the passenger’s seat.

Azula looks up and then pulls away from Katara. “I’m going to Ty Lee’s for a bit. I know it doesn’t matter as much, but it’s a hard day for me, too,” Azula says.

“Of course it is,” Suki says gently and gives Azula’s arm a pat. “Go take a break.”

Azula gives a half-hearted smile and walks over to Ty Lee. She gets into the back seat and then the car drives off.

“Thank you for coming,” Iroh’s voice says. Sokka turns back to see the old man standing at the threshold of the front door. “Please come in.”

Sokka knocks on a grey door inside Iroh’s house and waits for a second. “Zuko?” He asks softly. “Baby, it’s Sokka. And the others. Can we come in?”

He waits for a moment and bites his lip. Then there’s a soft tap on the other side of the door.

“Is Uncle with you?” Zuko’s raspy voice is so small. Sokka leans his forehead on the door, briefly forgetting his friends are behind him.

“No. It’s just us,” Sokka says. The door clicks and creaks open a couple of inches. There are footsteps retreating from the door and Sokka gently pushes it the rest of the way open. Zuko’s curled up in the corner close to the far windows and across from his bed. Azula’s bed is made up nicely but Zuko’s is missing all of the covers. They’re in a pile on the floor and his dresser is a mess. Sokka comes over and kneels across from his boyfriend. Zuko doesn’t look at him.

_ Be patient with him, _ Iroh had said.  _ He’s not completely with us. _

“Hi, baby,” Sokka says softly. “We’re here for you. What can we do?”

Zuko lifts his head up a little but lets it fall against the wall. “Azula...thinks I...I need to talk about it,” he says. His voice is scratchy and rough. Like he’s been screaming. Sokka buries a tiny flare of anger that Zuko still hasn’t gone to a therapist. He’s been refusing for weeks. “Can...Can I tell you how I got this?” He asks and puts a hand over his left eye.

“If you’re up for it,” Suki says and joins Sokka on the floor. “If you’re up for it, we’ll listen.”

Zuko nods and drops his gaze. “I...I guess it started when my mom left. I mean, Dad hit me for as long as I can remember. But...when she left...there was no one around to...keep him under control. Zula was too young to take on that role,” he starts and then wraps his arms around his knees. Sokka aches to hold him but he doesn’t think Zuko would react well to being grabbed right now. Even if it were for a hug.

“When I turned twelve...Dad wanted me to get more involved in his company. I don’t really know why, it wasn’t like I was set up to inherit it or anything. For most of my life up until then...he said I was...too stupid to work there,” Zuko continues. “I didn’t want to but I didn’t have a choice.

“A-A year later he brought me to an actual board meeting. I don’t know why. He told me I had to stay quiet the entire time. He….He’d been especially violent that day. Like the kind of violent where every time he saw me I…” Zuko stops and takes a deep breath. “I got attacked.”

Sokka glances at his shaking hands and offers his own. Zuko stares at it for a second but then takes it and squeezes.

“By the time I got to the board meeting...I was in so much pain and I was so tired and I just wanted to go back home and be with Azula. Anyway...some guy at the meeting said a certain branch of the company wasn’t performing that efficiently. He said he predicted the cause was because there happened to be a couple of pregnant women in the branch and they just weren’t able to work as hard because...I don’t even know. Some stupid, sexist garbage like that.

“Dad pro-proposed that he’d just fire them. I...I was so fucking stupid,” Zuko rips his hand away from Sokka and digs his fingers into his hair. “I told him he couldn’t do that. That...That they would need financial stability for-” he breaks off again and whimpers. He grips his hair tighter and a sob bubbles from his throat.

“He kicked me out of the meeting. Saying I clearly didn’t understand how businesses like his worked and told me to wait in the car. So...So I did. He came back a little while later and...he-he beat me in the parking lot for a bit.”

Zuko shudders and holds his legs closer. “He didn’t stop shouting the whole drive home. I-I saw people in other cars giving us weird looks. One...One woman looked like she was about to call 911 or something.”

Sokka holds his breath. He knows they’re getting close to the end of the story and he hates it so much.

“I started crying at some point and he got even angrier and eventually I just...I told him I hated him. I told him I hated him and that I wish he’d left instead of Mom and that I didn’t even want to be his son.” Zuko reaches for Sokka’s hand again and his fingers tremble.

“He didn’t do anything until we got home. He dragged me out of the car and didn’t even wait until we got in the house to just...attack. He kept shouting at me and saying he should have killed me when I was born and that I was disgusting and stupid,” Zuko shudders again and pulls Sokka a little closer.

“I-I tried to call for help but he covered my mouth and pulled me inside. He...He threw me on the floor and then turned on the stovetop. I tried to crawl away but he grabbed me and-” Zuko lifts his head and stares at the floor. “And then he pressed my face into the fire.”

Sokka lets his breath go and sobs. Katara and Aang sink to the floor and Toph sniffs from Azula’s bed.

“I...I never even passed out. I saw Azula come in when Dad let me go and I saw her scream and cry. Dad just told her I was going to the hospital and he gave me a t-shirt to hold on my eye and carried me to the car and drove me to the emergency room.”

Sokka bites his lip and tries not to sob again. Azula saying it was a hard day for her too suddenly made too much sense.

He hates this.

He hates how useless he feels and how he knows there’s nothing he can do to take that experience away.

“I..I can’t-” Zuko tries to say but cuts himself off with his own sobs. “I can’t talk about this anymore.”

“It’s okay,” Suki says, and tears roll down her cheeks. “You don’t have to keep going.”

“Zuko-” Katara breathes. “I am so sorry.”

He shakes his head and then looks at Sokka for the first time. He holds his arms out, just like he did when Sokka, Katara, and Aang picked him up from that monster’s house.

That house that he had to live in for three more years after his father mutilated him.

Sokka pulls Zuko into his grasp and tries to stay stoic while his boyfriend sobs into his chest.

“That’s horrible,” Toph whispers. “I-It’s horrible.”

Zuko takes a shaky breath. “T-The anniversary is never really this bad. I...I just keep having flashbacks. And nightmares. They haven’t stopped all week and I just want them gone!”

Sokka strokes Zuko’s hair and takes a deep breath. “Baby. It’s time to see someone.”

Zuko shakes his head. “I’m too far gone, they won’t be able to help,” he sobs.

Aang moves for the first time since he sunk to the floor and sits next to Sokka. “I thought that, too,” he says with tears rolling down his cheeks. “I was in different refugee camps by myself for a while. When Gyatso adopted me, he took me to a therapist and I figured they’d never understand or be able to help. But they were. And they can help you, too.”

“Please,” Toph says with the saddest voice Sokka has ever heard from her. “Please find one, Zuko. You’re in so much pain.”

Zuko looks up at Sokka and nods. He doesn’t say anything but he drops his head into Sokka’s lap.

“Did...Did telling us help?” Katara asks. Zuko nods again.

“A little bit. I’m tired,” he murmurs. “How did you know to come?”

“Azula called us,” Sokka says and runs a hand down Zuko’s shoulder. Zuko winces slightly.

“I was kind of awful to her this morning,” he admits. “I didn’t mean to, but it looked like she was going to touch my face and I panicked.”

“It’s okay,” Suki says. “She’s not angry at you. She just went to see Ty Lee for a bit.”

Zuko nods. “Good. I...I don’t think she has an easy time with this day either.”

Sokka shakes his head. They’re quiet for a moment and then there’s a soft knock on the door. Iroh pokes his head in and smiles sadly.

“Can I offer anyone some tea?” He asks. Zuko lifts his head and stands up on shaky legs. He walks across the room and then falls into Iroh. He holds onto Iroh’s shirt in a clingy hug and sighs. Iroh hugs him back carefully.

“Thank you,” Zuko whispers.

“For what?” Iroh murmurs.

Zuko doesn’t respond in English. Neither does Iroh.

Zuko looks back to the group and blushes. “Can...Can I take a nap? I’ll be down in a bit.”

“Of course,” Katara says and stands up. “We’ll wait for you. Sokka stands up and starts to follow the group out but Zuko catches his hand.

“Can you stay?” He asks. Sokka smiles and nods. He shuts the door quietly and lets Zuko lead him to his bed.

Zuko curls up next to him and sighs. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, baby,” Sokka whispers and kisses Zuko’s forehead. Zuko hums and shuts his eyes.

Sokka holds him close and shuts his own eyes.

This was the hardest day of his life.

But at least it ended with a glimmer of hope.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll give y'all a brief break from the angst next part, don't worry.  
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
